the pee auditions
I have many questions about life. Random thoughts pop into my head, and then I have to analyze them.
So let’s talk about watersports… or more specifically, how people audition to to be in watersports porn.
When I go to a job interview, I get nervous and have to pee a lot. Being nervous is natural, of course. So what happens when an actor goes to try out for a watersports film? I’m sure he’s a little nervous, at least the first time. Not only do they have to be naked in front of strangers, but they also have to pee for them? Wow, talk about pressure.
So does it work in the reverse? If a person says “Excuse me, I need to go to the restroom before we start.” does the director stop them and say “Wait, why don’t you just pee in front of me?”
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not making fun of porn stars who do watersports movies. I can just see some pissed ticked off actor responding to this. I’m just saying the auditions must be pretty interesting.
stroke my ego.
AdamMale Provides “Heart-On†for One Popular Blogger
Published: March 15, 2006 {Press Release for AdamMale.com}
Hillsborough, N.C. – AdamMale, a gay, adult mail order catalog and Web company, is providing thrills to one very observant blogger.
In a series of ongoing articles about AdamMale, Blogger Nathan used his online space to record his likes and dislikes about the popular AdamMale catalog – everything from catalog copy to product photos was critiqued.
Much to his surprise, AdamMale was listening – and Nathan noticed!
Several updates to his blog include references to how photos were changed and copy was edited, in accordance to his marketing tips and suggestions.
“When someone gives you such sage advice, it has to be rewarded,†said company spokesman Craig Ledford. “We sent Nathan a large basket of AdamMale.com’s best offerings for helping us out.â€
AdamMale is a sister company of Adam & Eve, a company with more than 30 years of experience in providing premium customer satisfaction through its catalog, Web and home parties endeavors.
For more information, visit http://www.AdamMale.com
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AdamMale Gives Loving To Its Customers
Published: March 16, 2006 {Blog Entry on Queerty.com}
We consider the gay adult products catalog to be something pretty utilitarian: an old friend that is there when we need him, even if he’s kind of plain. He gets the job done, even if the “taste level isn’t quite there,” in the words of Project Runway Judge/Editor-in-Chief of Elle magazine Nina Garcia. And we thought he was pretty content the way he is.
Nathan over at Nathan Exposed thought differently, and decided to poke fun at his favorite adult catalog, AdamMale, in a hilarious post that picks apart some of their more awful photos and suggests changes. When he received his next catalog, the photo at left had been changed! He suspected they had read his blog, and it turns out he was correct.
They just sent him a huge gift basket containing a little bit of everything, from porn to cockrings to dirty playing cards. But the best prize of all was the giant bottle of “Wet: Platinum” lube. That stuff costs as much as a romantic dinner for two, and lasts so much longer.
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Thanks for all the attention guys! I agree with Queerty.com about the Wet Platinum. It’s gooood 
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I Heart AdamMale
The Backstory: Last winter, I posted an entry poking fun at some of the photos in AdamMale’s catalog. A few months later, I received a new AdamMale catalog and it appeared that they had re-shot one of the photos as a result of my blog entry. So I posted a follow-up saying that I had influenced the marketing of AdamMale, and asked them to send me some porn as incentive for helping their catalog.
The Update: To my surprise, I received an e-mail from James at AdamMale, confirming that their catalog really was influenced by my blog. So today, I received a huge box of goodies from James. He covered all the bases. Cockrings, ball weights, butt plugs, dildos, dirty playing cards, porn DVD’s, and a gigantic bottle of lube!
A Word of Thanks: I want to thank AdamMale for being so cool about everything. They have a great sense of humor, and James has been extremely generous to me. This also speaks volumes about their customer service. They clearly care what consumers think of their catalog, and are willing to make improvements based on feedback. I think that’s awesome.
What Really Tickles Me: I can’t help laughing when I imagine James picking out the products he sent me. What was the thought process? Did he read my blog and try to figure out what I’d like? Did he wonder “Who is this ‘Nathan Exposed’ guy anyway”? Just thinking about someone picking out porn for me makes me laugh 
What This Means for My Readers: James has set-up a special coupon code for my readers!
Visit AdamMale.com and enter coupon code “NATHAN” to receive 25% off your purchase! How sweet is that?
Final Point: I think AdamMale is an all-around great company. They have been incredibly receptive to my feedback, and very professional about everything. Let’s face it, most of us have bought porn or some kind of adult product at some point. I’m not ashamed to say it. If you want a great selection of videos, toys, and accessories, I highly recommend them. I have bought products from them in the past, and they are very reliable and discreet.
Check them out at AdamMale.com and don’t forget to enter coupon code “NATHAN” at checkout to get 25% off!
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You might recall that last month, I was joking about the AdamMale catalog. It looks like they saw my post and took some notes!
I received a new catalog in the mail and they took a NEW photo for the double-headed dildo. For years, they were using an awful photo of a woman with long fingernails holding the dildo. Who wants that?
So after seeing my post, they shot a new photo with nice hairy man hands. And it looks like he just got a manicure. Cute.
BUT – I do have one complaint. Where is my shipment of free porn, AdamMale? Huh? Since I influenced you enough to change your catalog, don’t you think I deserve a gift certificate?
My e-mail is secrets [at] nathanexposed.com. Don’t keep a boy waiting.
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Porn Humor
Tonight at the office Christmas party, some of my friends at work were telling me how funny they thought this post from Nov. 5th was. So I’m re-posting it for all my newbies to see. I hope you get a laugh out of it
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I love AdamMale’s catalog. Despite my love for them, I often notice things in their printed catalog that make me laugh. This is just for humor, I am not dissing them.
1. Swirl Top Anal Plug
Look at this dildo. No really, look at it! Are you going to stick that thing up your ass? It looks like a drill. It’s so scary, they cropped the photo so you couldn’t see the top of it. I really believe it has a pointed end.
That’s not hot. It might be fun to use the term “drill” when talking about sex, but I don’t think you should be sticking anything up your ass that resembles a drill. Very disturbing.
2. Love Jet
If your ass is so dirty that you need a water hose to clean it out, maybe you should consider being a top instead.
I don’t understand the marketing of this thing. They start out by promoting it as a method for cleaning your cock and balls. They say you can hook it up to the faucet. Who is so busy that they clean their dick off in the sink? Don’t you have time for a shower?
Suddenly I have visions of male prostitutes hooking this gadget up to sinks in gas stations so they can clean off between clients. Clever, aren’t I? But how do you perform this function? Isn’t it messy? You can’t exactly stand on the floor and spray off your dick. So do you hang your cock and balls over the sink and clean them that way?
If you’re a slut on the run, just wet some paper towels and clean your dirty ass off. And as far as douching…I’m sticking to my original statement. If you’re in such bad shape that you need a hose to blast the shit out of your ass, maybe your ass needs a day off.
3. Tender Chickens DVD
I don’t understand the appeal of this movie. Is anybody here really interested in buying this? If so, I want to know! First of all, why is there a cartoon chicken on the cover? And what is sexy about chickens anyway? Did you notice the joke on the opening line of the description? “Although there aren’t tender chickens in the video there are packages of lean meat.” Are we talking about barnyard animals or did I miss out on some new gay slang?
And who is this guy just hanging out to the left? I don’t think he’s sexy at all. He looks nervous and awkward. He doesn’t have any pants on, but he does have a shirt on in the photo and on the cover. Why be conservative at this point? If you’re getting your ass pounded in the video, why be shy about taking your shirt off? And then there’s the older man to the right. He just looks scary. I definitely think he is into spanking.
4. Smoothie
Why is a woman with long, sharp fingernails holding this double dildo? This woman and her long fingernails don’t belong anywhere near a dildo in a gay men’s catalog. Why isn’t a man holding it? Is there a shortage of man hands?
The description clearly says “it’s great for ass to ass grinding”. How many women perform “ass to ass grinding”? Probably zero. So why is a woman selling this product? It’s the fingernails that scare me the most. They belong with that evil drill dildo.
5. Fine Bi Me
You can’t even read a gay men’s catalog without seeing titties! It’s listed on Page 43! That means you’ve looked at 42 pages of totally gay movies and toys, and now all of a sudden you come across a movie for bi-sexuals.
Who does that? Who says “Oh good! This magazine has women! I was beginning to think it was for gay people. *sigh of relief*” You know these men are in the closet. They think the woman in the middle makes it safe, but they really want to kick her ass to the curb and start fucking like there is no tomorrow.
6. The “Black” Page
There is such a shortage of good porn with black people. The titles always have something about “chocolate” or “black monster cocks”. And the actors are terrible. Look at this guy on the left. He’s terrified. His arms are crossed, he looks so tense. No wonder they sell “The Black Hole” at the bottom of the page.
This guy on the left isn’t putting out tonight, that’s for sure. So you’re going to be left disappointed and need “The Black Hole” to finish the deed.
On a sidenote, when did it start mattering what color the fake hole was that you jack off in? Does anybody use a self-masturbating toy and say “Oh, I’m so glad I’m fucking a fake black hole instead of a white one”?
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