So I’m Unbalanced
Illustration by Marcus Cutler
A few days ago Daniel and I became proud owners of a Wii Fit Plus. It instantly became our new addiction.
I generally find exercise to be boring and prefer vodka and laxatives. Yum! Thankfully I’ve managed to maintain a healthy weight and my BMI is within the normal range. The game recommended I lose 7 pounds to be optimal so I’m going to work on that.
My real issue is apparently balance. I fail at any exercise that requires me to use posture or coordination to gain points. I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that I’m 30 and I’ve been designing websites since I was 15. A good chunk of my life has been spent in a chair working at a computer. I’m obviously slouching more than I should even though I try to make it a habit to sit up straight. Now my life as a web developer appears to be taking a toll.
I’m confident Wii Fit Plus will assist me with improving myself. If nothing else it’s made me more aware.
But I still laugh every time it says I’m unbalanced! Thanks Nintendo.
Graduation Day
Over the weekend, our dog Anna graduated from obedience training. She celebrated this momentous occasion by promptly taking a shit in the middle of the floor, right in front of her instructor. Then, to make sure she left a lasting impression, she got into a slapping fight with her classmate.
That’s our girl.
Hello 30
I turned 30 last month. It was on November 20, to be exact.
Daniel organized a wonderful surprise birthday party. It was a murder mystery with a group of friends. We all had roles and scripts. I was not the killer, in case you were wondering. But I was a suspect. 
And then when we got home that night, Daniel surprised me with a Nintendo Wii. I love it! Even if you think you’re not someone who enjoys video games, you should still check it out.
Bowling and baseball are both a lot of fun on the Wii. So are the Super Mario Bros. games, which bring back my sentimental affection for the ’80s. Some of the games really give you a full body workout too.
I didn’t reach all my goals before 30, but I’m okay with that. I wanted to be raising at least one child by now, but that’s still in the plans. It will just have to happen in my 30s instead. I also didn’t finish my first novel, but it’s for the best as well. I’m learning more about how to effectively build characters and plots, so I know it will be better than it would have been.
I did marry the man I love earlier this year. That’s a milestone to all its own. I’m very happy about that. And I did start my own business in 2007. I guess not everyone in their 20s can say that. So I’m happy with what I’ve accomplished and looking forward to what lies ahead.
Hello 30!
Wedding Photos, Part 2: The Ceremony
Daniel and I were married on April 2, 2011.
The top of the wedding cake with a rainbow flag flying proudly in the background.
A photo of Daniel getting dressed for the wedding.
Wedding Photos, Part 1: The Engagement
I’m getting together the photos of our engagement, wedding, and honeymoon to share. Starting with the engagement photos…
I proposed to Daniel on the chilly autumn night of October 1, 2010. We were walking in a park in Nashville, under the moon and stars, and I told him I wanted to share something with him. I was concerned about remembering all the words that were in my heart, so I had already written out everything on my phone. That night, I got down on one knee and read to Daniel, telling him how much I love him and how I want to share the rest of my life with him. Then I pulled out the ring and put it on his finger as tears began to stream down his face.
Introducing Our New Puppy, Mrs. Madrigal
There’s a new addition to our family… A baby Schnauzer named Mrs. Anna Madrigal. Let me start by explaining the name.
Mrs. Madrigal is our favorite character in Armistead Maupin’s Tales of the City book series. A sweet, eccentric, pot-smoking tranny who plays Mother Hen to the main cast of characters. I think Mrs. Madrigal is the mom every gay man wishes he had. Anyway, I always thought it would be fun to name a pet after the character. So that’s the origin. We simply call her Anna, as it’s much easier to explain to strangers.
Unlike the character in the books, our Mrs. Madrigal is 100% female. She was born on March 24, which was my Grandmother’s birthday. How appropriate that we’d fall in love with a little puppy who shared the birth date with a great woman in my life.
Daniel and I got her over the weekend and training her has been a full-time adventure. But for the most part, she’s pretty calm, especially for a puppy. She loves to give kisses and cuddle with her two daddies. The first few nights were hard for her because she’d just been weaned from her mother, father, and 5 siblings. But we’ve been giving her plenty of attention to keep her happy.
I hope you all like puppy photos because I’m sure there are many more around the corner! 
Tennessee, the Home of Anti-Gay Laws
The city of Nashville, which I love so much and affectionately refer to as “Homeville,” has been in the news a lot lately. Specifically, it has been the battleground for several embarrassing and discriminatory laws that have passed by a landslide.
It started last year, when we passed a new law making it illegal to discriminate on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity. Sounds like an amazing step forward, right?
Well business owners cried foul, saying that this conflicted with their religious beliefs. True story. People actually argued that their personal religious views were being violated if they were not allowed to discriminate against gay and transgender people. (Palm to forehead.)
So the non-discrimination law was repealed and Gov. Bill Haslam signed the repeal tonight. In the year 2011, a state governor actually re-instated a law that says it’s perfectly fine to discriminate against gay people. Wonderful.
Next, we have a law in the works that would make it illegal for anyone in the school system to discuss or even acknowledge homosexuality around children in grades K-8. As an example, let’s say a middle school kid is gay, or perceived to be gay, and he’s being bullied by his peers. He goes to a trusted teacher or mentor to talk about it. Under this law, the teacher cannot discuss it with the child because, according to law, the topic of being gay is forbidden. Yes, forbidden! The teacher could be fired on the spot.
So now being gay has become some type of swear word, which only sends a message to GLBT youth that there is something wrong with them. Wow, what a wonderful solution for all these teen suicides! Make gay youth feel even more outcast by not allowing their teachers to talk with them!
Daniel and I went to a protest event, which is where I took the touching photograph above. There were many straight people with kids there, showing their support for equality and agreeing that there is nothing wrong with gay people.
Despite protests, calls and letters to state leaders, the bill has passed several rounds of voting. It’s sponsored by Stacey Campfield, a member of the TN House of Representatives. The sad thing is that flaming closet case has been passionately pursuing this bill for years! Don’t you just love it when politicians are so deep in the closet, they decide to punish the rest of us with these outrageous laws? It won’t go through the next round until next season, so thankfully it’s on hold for now. I hope during the summer he gets caught in some gloryhole bathroom stall encounter by an undercover cop and voters will see just how hypocritical he is. Maybe then, this stupid bill will be put to rest before it becomes law.
Anyway, this is my long overdue rant about Tennessee’s current politics. These issues have weighed heavily on Daniel and me. As a newly married gay couple in Nashville, we are very sad that the state is constantly finding new ways to strip away GLBT rights.
And it’s a tough topic because these laws do not reflect the view of all Tennesseans. We have many diverse and open-minded communities. Gay and straight people live, work, and socialize peacefully together throughout the state. I really do love this city. I wish the bigots were not doing so much damage in Nashville.
There’s that voice inside that says run away, as fast as we can, to a new state, where we’ll be more accepted. But there’s also a triumphant spirit inside that says we deserve to live here just as much as anyone else. This place is our home too, and we should continue fighting the battle for equality. We have a wonderful support system of family and friends here, so I don’t suppose we’ll be running away just yet. We love them too much to leave right now.
Our Wedding Day
Thank you all for the kind comments about our wedding. It took place on the warm, windy afternoon of April 2, 2011. We got married in a friend’s backyard overlooking the Cumberland River in Nashville.
The ceremony began with a live choir performance of “You Raise Me Up” as our Mothers were escorted down the aisle to their seats. Then the song “Come What May” by Ewan McGregor and Nicole Kidman began. One by one, our groomsmen and the minister made their way up to the center deck. Then Daniel and I came around the sides and met in the middle.
Daniel was already crying by then. We held hands as the minister performed the ceremony. Then Daniel broke into a surprise performance halfway through, singing “Love of My Life” to me. That was a beautiful and emotional scene. It was hard to proceed though because I was so touched by it.
But we did finish. And after we were announced husband and husband, we turned around and smiled proudly at the crowd as the song “Falling in Love” by Taio Cruz played.
A backyard Southern style barbecue meal followed for the reception, and then we cut the cake. I love the cake! It was white with purple ribbons and flowers. Daniel and I designed it in Photoshop and the bakery replicated our design perfectly. On the inside, the white cake layers had purple in between them.
Our first dance was to Uncle Kracker’s song “Smile.” That’s always been our song. Then the party started and went on into the night. It was the most amazing experience!
My only regret is that it couldn’t last longer somehow. Everyone warned me to enjoy every moment of my wedding day. But naturally it flew by. I’m so thankful for the happy memory I have and am enjoying my new life as a married man.
I’ll post some photos when we get them back from the photographer.
I Now Pronounce You Husband and Husband
On Saturday, April 2nd, Daniel and I were married. I’m so excited and have so many details to fill in about the ceremony. But for now, I wanted to share a snapshot from the happy occasion.
My Kind of Bachelor Party
The countdown begins as the wedding is just around the corner.
Next month, Daniel and I are getting married. We’re wrapping up the finishing touches on all the details: the cake, music for the reception, groomsmen gifts, table decorations… Planning the wedding together has been fun, although nobody could have ever prepared me for how detailed it is. Whew. A lot goes into a wedding!
On Friday, a few of our groomsmen gave us our own kind of bachelor party. Not the kind where you go to strip clubs and get wasted. That’s not appealing and didn’t fit our personality types. But we did have fun. They took Daniel and I out to a nice dinner, then bought us drinks at the bar, followed by an evening of dancing. It was a great time without going overboard or feeling hungover the next day.
Then on Saturday and Sunday, we had lazy days, watching the movie versions of Tales of the City, based off my favorite book series. It was the perfect weekend.
Spring is in the air and everything is starting to bloom. It feels like winter flew by because we were so engrossed in planning the wedding and honeymoon details. Once it’s all done, I’m not sure what we’ll do with our free time. We’re so used to being busy!
But life is going well and I’m looking forward to what’s next.
