David Archuleta is finally legal. He turned 18 on December 28th.

So for all you homos with a twink syndrome (you know who you are), it’s okay to publicly admit you have the hots for him. Now that the whole world is his oyster, it’s time for David to decide what kind of homo he’s going to be when he grows up.

I’m going to guess he’s a sugary romantic at heart, probably writes love poems in his journal and waits for his prince to come and whisk him away on a white horse. David is traditional in that way. I think he gets a nervous case of flatulence on his first dates and he’s saving himself for that special someone.

What can I say? I’m good at reading people.

But wouldn’t it be a hoot if he were secretly an aggressive leather daddy with a fisting fetish? I can just see him all Criso’d up telling some guy in a sling to “take it like a man”. What a sight that would be!

In other news, last month I wrote a post about David stating that his official website said it was “coming soon” even though David had a full length album available in stores.

So how did they rectify the situation? With a Ning page! That’s right. Ning. If you’re not familiar, it’s a wannabe MySpace site that kind of blurs the lines between forum and blog. This is as good as it gets. Come in 2nd place on American Idol and you’ll get your very own Ning page. Hiring a real web designer to build a real web site would just be too much effort for Jive.

Anyway, happy birthday David and have a great new year! You can handball all the men you want now. Please send us photos.

I should have known that you’d have this date marked in giant red holiday marker. Now, exactly how do we get ahold of him?

Well, on his Ning Page, he is wearing a leather jacket in his holiday greeting. However, looks like they used a fish eye lense, and that is not a good look for him. But, thanks for telling me I can openly lust for him, now that he is no longer jailbait.