In 12 hours, Rodney and I will be arriving in the city that never sleeps. I’m so excited about visiting that I doubt I’ll get any rest tonight, even though I should since we have an early flight in the morning.
In case you can’t tell, it’s our first time in New York. The list of things to do is overwhelming, but thankfully we’ll be hanging out with my good friend Rey, and he helped calm me down by planning out a logical itinerary for our stay.
Aside from visiting all the standard tourist hotspots, we’ll also be seeing Mika in concert on Saturday, and going to a taping of The View on Tuesday. Lots to do!
I’m sure I’ll have plenty of stories when we get back.

The Democratic presidential primary for Tennessee is on Tuesday, February 5th. I think it’s important to speak up and encourage people to vote for the candidate we support, and that’s why I’m asking my Tennessee readers to vote for Hillary Clinton.
I have followed the candidates closely in recent months, and after strongly weighing out the pros and cons, I’ve come to the solid conclusion that Hillary is the best person for the job. She is intelligent and experienced, and has put together a very organized plan for running this country.
She’s the one candidate that really gets me excited about the future of America. Unfortunately our country has been tarnished and severely damaged in recent years, and there were times that I truly did feel ashamed of what our country had become. But as history will tell us, all countries do go through rough spells, and all it takes is a good leader to turn things around. I believe that Hillary will do this for America, and that’s the reason why I get excited.
I think about the opportunity in our future. Not only for myself, but for other minorities, and children, and those without healthcare. I think about our freedom and our relationships with other countries. We can not continue to alienate ourselves; we have to work together to restore peace on this planet. We might live in different countries, but we all live on a place called Earth, and we have to stick together.
I am confident that Hillary can improve on these issues and make the country (and world) better for all of us. She makes me want to jump in and get involved. She makes me feel like a member of the team. And I really feel like she knows what she’s doing. There is just no more room for stupidity in the Presidential office, and I feel strongly that Hillary is far from being “stupid” about anything.
So when Feb. 5th roles around in Tennessee, I hope that my local readers will consider voting for Hillary Clinton. She is a woman with a plan, and that is something that makes me feel proud of this country.
And for those of you in other states, please get involved if you haven’t already. History is being made right now, and the states that are voting in the new week will help determine who is on your ballot in November.
Click here for more information about Hillary’s Tennessee Headquarters.
I enjoy it when I find a simple life lesson hidden in a common place, so please indulge me as I start to sound like Mike Brady from The Brady Bunch.
This past weekend, one of our nephews and his girlfriend visited us to celebrate Rodney’s upcoming birthday. We had the spontaneous idea to play the card game Uno… and I love spontaneous card games, by the way.
We decided to play to 500 points, so we did, and I lost each time. I’m not very good at card games, and I had a lot of questions because it had been awhile since I played this particular game.
Rodney did end up in the lead. He always wins games, just so you know. He’s a good sport too. He never brags or takes it too seriously. I think it takes the fun out of things when people go overboard, so it’s nice that both Rodney and I are casual. He doesn’t get too wrapped up in winning, and I don’t get too wrapped up in losing.
So yes, Rodney was ahead, followed by our nephew and his girlfriend, and then I was in last place.
But as it turned out, my luck took a sudden twist, and I won 5 games simultaneously, coming in at 1st place. It’s worth noting that I never win games… in fact, I can’t remember a time in my life, even as a child, when I won a card game or even board game.
So the moral of this little story was that it does not matter how far behind you feel, you can always come out ahead, even when the odds are against you. I think we just have to keep playing with the cards that we are dealt, because change might be just around the corner.
This lesson extends far beyond Uno, and pours over into the game of life too. 
Oh, the joy of beggars.
Last week, one of my clients took a few of his employees and me out to lunch at a place near downtown Nashville. While we were eating at our table, a supposedly “deaf” man walked up to all of us and handed us cards that asked for a cash donation. He threw in a random “UHHHH” just to seem believable. It had no relevance, I guess he was just grunting? Or maybe he was reciting one of the many rap songs on the radio that start out with people grunting… again, for no reason.
The client and his employees all picked up the cards and read them compassionately. I ignored the card, not even reading it, and continued eating my lunch. I was completely un-phased and immune to any form of begging.
Everyone at the table was shocked at how nonchalant and “uncaring” I was.
Sorry, that’s just how I feel. Rodney and I make plenty of donations to reputable organizations that feed the homeless. I am not about to whip out my wallet and give cash to someone, who could easily snatch the whole thing out of my hands and be out the door before I could blink. No way.
He came back around, angry that nobody had their money out, and stuck out his hand to demand that we give back his cards. Done.
Fast forward to this weekend. I was getting groceries in the town we live in… 45 minutes away from where I had lunch with my client. I turned around and came eye to eye with the SAME “deaf” man. He let out his “UHHHH” sound and tried to hand me the card. I rolled my eyes and said “Not you again” and walked away.
I got the distinct impression he heard me too.
He then proceeded to go through the aisles, harassing customers and trying to grab food out of their carts.
Do I need to point out what’s wrong with this situation? It doesn’t matter if he takes food out of their carts, because it hasn’t been paid for. He wouldn’t get out of the store with it anyway, so why would he go through the carts taking food? It’s the same stuff that’s on the shelves.
Let’s not forget the most important question either: How is our deaf friend getting from one place to the other, and where does he intend to store all the cash and food once he gets it?
I write this post with humor, not cruelty. I have plenty of care and compassion for people who are in need of food or money. But come on… this story has scam written all over it.
If you have a cat, you’ll probably appreciate this post.
There is a litter box that is extremely popular, called the Litter Maid. It’s electronic and self cleaning. 10 minutes after a cat has been in the litter box, a sensor activates and a large rake scoops up the clumped litter, dropping it in a removable compartment that you can empty. Anyone with more than one cat knows this product is heaven sent.
We bought out Litter Maid in 2003, and it was loyal servant until 2008. So when it stopped working, I went to Petsmart and picked up a new one, called the Litter Maid Elite. A lot has changed in 5 years. The new model had a stainless steel rake, which is removable for easy cleaning. It also has a built in ionic air neutralizer and digital clock in case the girls are running late for an appointment.
Okay, I jest! The clock is there so I can schedule the box to turn off at night. So we were all very excited about the new shit box, and our girls were anxious to get in and take it for a spin. They had to sniff it out first, but eventually one of them was brave enough to grace it with some urine.
That’s when the fun really began! The fancy-schmancy stainless steel rake is worthless. Litter slides right through the teeth of the rake, and it doesn’t pick up anything. It’s basically a $100 clock that holds litter.
I went online and read reviews. The average rating was 1 star and everyone is having the same problem. How could this thing even stay on the market? Didn’t anyone at the company test it first?
I went to 4 different stores, and none of them sold the old models anymore. They’re not even being made anymore. Thankfully Rodney was able to go to a Wal-Mart super center in the town he works in, and they had 4 of the old models left.
So he got it home, put together, and it was defective. The rake just scooped back and forth continuously. I let it go for 20 minutes, thinking eventually it would stop. It never did.
I emptied all the litter out of it, boxed it up, and he returned it.
He got another one, and I was literally doing the sign of the cross in hopes that it work. It did. Woo-hoo!
So we have a working Litter Maid, the old model, and I’m just hoping this one lasts 5 years too. Maybe by then, the company will have fixed their stupid new Elite model.
The girls can now poop in peace, and we no longer have to manually scoop it up. All is happy in the household.
I have an interesting dilemma, which I’ve discussed with Rodney, but still am not sure I know the best approach.
With my website design business, I get a lot of random inquiries. Some people are just curious, others are serious. But they all pretty much have the same questions.
The challenge is decoding what they say when we talk and making a split second decision as to whether or not they would be a good client. I don’t know how to define what a “good client” is, but after you’ve been doing something for awhile, you do develop the ability to sense it pretty easily.
Whatever your job is, you probably have the same ability. You can tell from a mile away.
So the hard part is turning people down. Oh, the drama. Nobody ever takes it well. I get yelled at, I get called names, and you’d think I just killed their dog. The only positive thing about the experience is that they just proved that my suspicions were right about them.
What should I do differently? Should I take the easy road and just lie, saying I’m “too busy” to help them? Should I ignore them completely and hope they’ll forget about me?
They say honesty is the best policy, but I’m beginning to doubt it. If I’m honest and tell a person I’d like to pass on a job, I give them something to be mad about.
But if I lie and saying I’m busy, then at least they can just chalk it up to bad timing. And if I ignore them completely, they will probably be bothered for awhile, but will eventually forget about me because I haven’t really given them anything to be mad about.
Anyone have any ideas on what works best?
I wrote this post at the end of November 2007, and felt it was too early for Christmas posts.
Now it’s almost the end of January 2008, and I just came back across it.
Should I hold on to it for 12 months or publish it now? Oh what the hell… I’m unconventional and I play by my own rules. So here it is, a Christmas post in January.
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It’s a bit early, but I’m watching Dr. Seusses’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas on TV. I used to love this cartoon. Watching it brings back all the memories of childhood.
Christmas in Illinois was almost always guaranteed to be a white one. On Christmas eve, my parents would drive me and my two brothers to Grandma and Grandpa’s farm in the country. We’d gather around the Christmas tree, and Grandma would hand out gifts. She always had homemade candy in individual tins, each with its own Christmas design. One can had peanut brittle. I hated the peanuts, but I liked the sugary brittle part. So I’d nibble off the sweet part and put the peanuts back in the tin can. Gross, I know.
The adults would play board games while my cousins and I compared stories about Santa Claus. It’s such a great feeling of joy that children have on Christmas. A little bit of magic mixed with sheer excitement. If only you could bottle that emotion and keep it forever.
That night, back at home, I’d go to bed, hardly able to sleep because I was anticipating Santa’s visit. I tried to fight sleep, determined to stay awake long to catch a glimpse of him. But eventually sleep won over.
I would wake up at 5AM, before anyone else in the house. As I crept down the stairs and looked under the tree, I saw that Santa had already left. There were even a few crumbs left in a plate to prove he’d stopped by…
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[Apparently I didn’t finish the post either, but you get the overall feeling of it. Merry Christmas!]
Today, as we honor Martin Luther King Jr., keep in mind that it only takes one person to change the world. If you ever feel like you want to achieve something, but fear you don’t have enough strength to do it on your own, just remember that you do. All it takes is one voice to spread a message, and before you know it, you can have millions of voices repeating your words.
All it takes is a few busy days, and then you realize you haven’t written a thing on your blog. Even worse, I left things in such a sad place. Well thanks for all the words of support and agreement. People don’t always agree, but it is nice when they do.
Well it was a good week, though it flew by. Yesterday and today, I spent on-site with clients. I usually don’t do that, because most of the website work I do can all be handled via phone or e-mail. But I did get free lunch two days in a row, so maybe I should meet with people more often.
(Yes, I’m aware I should be the one paying… believe me, I offered.)
Tonight, we watched A Clockwork Orange. It wasn’t as good or as shocking as I remembered, but Rodney had never seen it. I think I was about 10 years old when I first saw it. Oh, the things you see when you have older brothers.
In other news, Rodney has announced to me that he plans on writing on my blog. This is interesting news, coming from the guy who used to say he “has no interest in blogs.”
But he’s been reading mine lately, and one day he just walked in the room and said “You know, Nathan, you’re a really good writer.”
Thanks, Rodney. It only took you 7 years to say that.
I guess that’s it in my neck of the woods. I hope everyone is doing well.
Have you ever experienced something so intensely earth shattering that it knocks you on your ass and makes you feel like you’ve lived your whole life in a bubble?
Well I have.
There was a new series in the works, but it probably isn’t going to happen now, so I’ll just let the cat out of the bag. I was working on a video series called “Exposed TV”. This concept entailed conducting video interviews with people via webcam. The purpose was to share their amazing stories of what they had been through in life, and how they have remained strong. I really thought it was going to be an important and meaningful project.
My first volunteer was a friend who has been living with HIV for 22 years. He has been through more stuff in two decades than many of us go through in our entire lives. Physically, he has been on a rollercoaster, and probably heard death knocking on the door more than a few times. Emotionally, he has buried two partners, both who died of HIV.
We talked for 4 hours on webcam, all the while thinking it was recording. His story was incredible. It moved me, it enlightened me, it inspired me. He is one of the kindest, warmest people I’ve ever met, and I hate it that he has suffered so much in his life. It truly feels unfair.
For whatever reason, there was a blip in the webcam recording. Huge chunks of the video did not record. I have no idea why. Every time I come up with a theory, I find another clue that sends me in a different direction. So I’ve pretty much given up releasing this video, as there is just too much missing to make a tangible documentary.
I’ve also given up doing more episodes of Exposed TV, because I fear the same technical glitch would happen again. Maybe webcam technology isn’t advanced enough to record 4 hours of data, I don’t know.
Anyway, even though the video isn’t all there, the experience still is. It has stuck with me since Saturday, and left this gigantic feeling of sadness in my heart. This isn’t just a news story I was doing, it was a real human being’s life. It made me realize how small and petty my day to day complaints are. Nothing I’ve been through measures up to the kind of pain this man has survived. Nothing.
On top of it all, this is the story of millions of people around the world who are affected in some way by HIV. We are all connected to this.
If I feel this sad because of one person’s story, I can’t even imagine what it’s like for those actually living with it. I can’t imagine what volunteers and support groups feel like on a day to day basis. Like I said, this is a realization that has knocked me on my ass and made me look at everything with more clarity.
I usually try to wrap up my posts with a closing note, or a call to action. But I don’t have one for this. The call of action is up to you.