Nathan Exposed » In a Funk

Does anybody still use that phrase? In a funk? A funkity funk-funk? Well, I feel in a funk tonight.

Sometimes I just feel that way. A bit stuck, a bit bored, a bit sad for no reason. Maybe a little overwhelmed by the world and its gigantic size, and the occasional feeling that I am just a teeny tiny spec within it.

Every couple of months, I pause to ask myself where I’m going and where I’ve been. Am I doing things right, am I being everything I can be?

There were a lot of deaths in the family this past summer, and I think I shut myself off from the world in many ways after that. It’s hard to get close to anyone without fearing they will be gone someday, in one way or another.

When I do get close to someone, it’s hard to maintain the relationship because I’m so critical of people. People just seem to disappoint me. Everyone’s in a hurry, such a rush. They don’t stop and think of others enough, and they think nobody notices. But I notice, and then I get my sensitive feelings hurt.

Nobody has time, but I have plenty. I make time. Sometimes people will call, and they’re so apologetic. “Is now a good time? Am I interrupting anything?” they ask.

But of course it’s a good time. They called because they had something to say. Naturally I would want to listen.

I wonder where time goes. We’re all connected by phones and computers, so it would seem we should have extra time left over. But we don’t. In fact, communication only seems to get worse and worse.

Now I’m starting to see where my funk comes from. It’s the things around me. There’s too much noise. Too much movement, too much speed. There’s too much fighting. I’m not fighting, but other people are. All the time. Even though I’m not participating, it’s hard to stand in the middle of a thunderstorm and not get wet.

I need silence. I need calmness. I need a hug.

Sat, Oct 20, 2007 @ 12:36 am | Filed in Life | Permalink

7 Comments

I know exactly how you feel Nathan. I too get in moods where no one or nothing can please me the way it used to. Where I feel like I can do nothing quite the same way. As corny as it sounds, I have deemed it as a male version of PMS. And it usually happens about once a month for me.

Posted by Daniel on Sat, Oct 20, 2007 @ 5:18 am

Hugs help. A man nuzzling your ear helps too. In all seriousness, it seems to be a part of the ebb and flow of life. I’ve never met anyone who is consistently on top of the world.

And I think all men go through the PMS thing as Daniel said. At least I know I do.

Posted by joey on Sat, Oct 20, 2007 @ 6:37 am

Thanks guys.

That’s so funny that you would bring up male PMS, because I absolutely believe we have our own “time of the month”

Mine usually comes around the 20th of the month. *looks at calendar*

Heyyy, wait a minute…

Posted by Nathan on Sat, Oct 20, 2007 @ 1:20 pm

I get in trouble because I always believe the best about people. Disappointment is inevitable. You’ve never disappointed me, though.

Posted by Daniel on Sat, Oct 20, 2007 @ 7:59 pm

Give or take the time difference, this may arrive a bit late but *HUGZ* nonetheless.

Posted by Sunshine on Sun, Oct 21, 2007 @ 11:01 pm

silence is a blessing.

i get funks. almost weekly!

Posted by chris on Tue, Oct 23, 2007 @ 11:57 am

I get in a funk every other week. LOL It’s all about making sure your goals and life are aligned.

Posted by Chip on Thu, Oct 25, 2007 @ 6:42 pm