Nathan Exposed » having faith in faith itself

having faith in faith itself

Have you ever noticed that it doesn’t matter how old you are, there is still a subconscious fear of disapproval from your parents?

Telling my parents about my career move has made me nervous for a long time. I expected the worst from them, I really did. They have a very old-school belief that you must “work for the man” and there are no exceptions.

They believe that you should always do what your boss says, no matter what. They believe you should keep your mouth shut and your head down. Don’t stir up trouble, don’t go against the norm. Just go to work, do your job, and be thankful for your paycheck.

Well, that’s never been me. I detest authority and I’ve never called someone my “boss” because I am nobody’s property. I believe that I am an equal. I refuse to feel inferior. I say what I think and what I feel. I give others respect and demand the same respect in return.

Needless to say, being an employee has never been a good fit for me. But I was very fortunate to work with some wonderful people at my last job. I wouldn’t trade that experience for anything.

Okay, so moving along… I finally told my Mom today. There was a dead silence on the phone, followed by a lot of sighing. I could feel the shit storm stirring. She was about to go off on me. But I cut her off and kept talking.

I told her that she and Dad have always believed in me. They always thought that I was talented and good with people, and always said I’d go far. I have countless letters, cards, and e-mails from them professing their love and faith that I can be anything I want to be.

I explained how lucky and fortunate I am to be loved so much by my parents. I could still feel the doubt in her tone, but she was definitely smiling. When I’m going on and on about how supportive they are, it’s pretty hard to yell at me. She told me she’s happy for me and glad it’s worked out.

No shit storm. No criticizing me for quitting a job. She did throw in a remark about giving up group insurance, and I quickly corrected her by saying “So I should give up all my opportunities so someone else will give me insurance?”

My Dad can be very blunt and critical at times. I think I dreaded his disapproval just as much. Tonight, I received an e-mail overflowing with love and support from him. He told me that he knew that I could do it, and he was very happy for me. Not an ounce of negativity. That means Mom turned around and told him good things, not bad.

I had 2 options: expect the very worst from my parents, and that’s exactly what I would receive… or expect the very best, and that’s exactly what I got.

Sun, Mar 18, 2007 @ 9:57 pm | Filed in Family | Permalink

4 Comments

im glad you got the very best. you deserve me.

Posted by aboutaboy on Mon, Mar 19, 2007 @ 12:19 pm

Honey, I will soon be 46 and I still cringe when I have to tell my parents something I think they’ll disprove of. I don’t think that ever goes away. Glad you’re mom & dad were supportive. They’re good people

Posted by cindy on Mon, Mar 19, 2007 @ 1:53 pm

What? No shit storm? Almost a let down, wasn’t it? Predictability shot all to hell. Great! People are never to old to change, that’s for sure.

Posted by Lewis on Mon, Mar 19, 2007 @ 4:25 pm

I’m glad they accepted your decision. I think you have great things awaiting you! But believe me, that feeling of having to tell you parents certain things never goes away. I knew when I told my parents I was selling my house and moving to Mexico it was not going to be received exactly well. And here I am a 40 year old man dreading what the response would be. Chilly at first but they are warming up to it.

Posted by martini-dan on Mon, Mar 19, 2007 @ 5:36 pm