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In January, my Grandma fell and broke her femur. Oddly enough, the night before, her phone line went out of service due to technical problems. She has a Medic-Alert device that she wears around her neck. But the signal is tied to her phone. So if the phone is out, the necklace will not send out a call for help. So that morning, she fell and could not call for help. She was unable to move at all so she just stayed there on the floor for at least 4 hours. Luckily, my Mom was coming over that morning so she found Grandma and got her to the hospital. Negativity seems to run on that side of the family. My Grandma has always been a person that believes life is hard. My Mom is the same way and unfortunately a lot of that rubbed off on me. But I’ve made a huge effort to break free from that mindset and good things are happening in my life as a result. Back to the story, things continued to get worse for Grandma. She was miserable, unhappy, and cried constantly. Everyone who came to visit her had the same pity attitude. Negativity just fed more negativity and Grandma had no optimism to get better. So she didn’t. She had surgery on the leg and lost a lot of blood. Still no optimism that she would ever get better. Her leg continued to get worse instead of better. She fell and cracked her femur in another place. Her body was too weak to do surgery again, so they had to put on a cast to stabilize the healing. Now the leg is very infected. The infection has spread and her leg may deteriorate. Meanwhile, Grandma is living in a nursing home so she can receive 24/7 care. She cries everyday. It’s very sad. Now… as harsh as this may sound, I constantly wonder if a positive attitude would have changed all this. Having an injured leg is not fun, I know that. But I have to wonder if everyone involved in this had reflected an attitude of good health and optimism, would she be getting better? My Mom is doom and gloom about this and has been from Day 1. I’ve tried and tried to tell her that she has an obligation to help lift Grandma’s spirits. But she just doesn’t seem to get it. I think my Mom takes comfort in believing that everything is wrong. When you believe that everything is wrong, you get a strange sense of satisfaction because it’s predictable. There are no surprises, nothing to worry about because you believe that life will give you the very worst and you can expect it. Sure enough, bad things show up around every corner and that re-affirms your faith that it all goes wrong. I hope that somehow my Grandma will take a positive turn. Every time I talk to her, I refuse to give in to the pity. I tell her she’s strong and getting better everyday. I tell her that’s she’s going to be healed and will be back on her feet soon. She seems to like that. The problem is that I’m the only one who believes in her. 
You have struck a chord with me (again). I definitely believe that whatever you set out to find, you will find. Negative or positive. If you’re looking for it, it’ll be there. And it goes so far beyond just having a positive attitude…..it’s a long-term way of life, from the inside out. Not just a few words or good thoughts. Truly, a new way of doing our entire business. Doesn’t matter what is coming at us……that has nothing to do with it. I’ll link to my Thanksgiving 101 post from last year. It was true then, it’s still true today. And, the best part? That you have recognized the family history and are trying to change it for yourself. That’s the only thing you are in charge of…..YOU. Good for you, Nathan. Posted by Lewis on Tue, Mar 27, 2007 @ 11:11 am I’m sure she’ll get better soon, I hope neither of you two gives up. It’s not the same to be positive as to be cheerful all the time. Positivism is a state of mind, that doesn’t necessarily needs to be expressed all the time. I had a friend who used to tell me: “No, don’t play those songs, they are sad songs” She wasn’t happy all the time, but I never saw her sad. Posted by danny on Tue, Mar 27, 2007 @ 1:05 pm You are right in the way a positive attitude affects our health. I saw the same thing with my grandmother and when she decided to die, she stayed with us only 2 months. Posted by DanNation on Tue, Mar 27, 2007 @ 2:25 pm A positive attitude has worked for me. I know that when I had a hard time during the past 21 years (I’m HIV+) it was usually accompanied by a negative attitude. If you think something will be bad it more than likely will be. Like side effects from medications, if you think you will have a bad side effect you probably will as you more than likely talk yourself into it. With a positive attitude you may still get the side effect but I bet it won’t be half as bad as if you thought if you had been negative about the whole thing. A positive attitude won’t fix everything but it sure will help make things better. I believe this and as I said, here I am 21 years later. Hope your grandmother gets better soon! Posted by TJ on Tue, Mar 27, 2007 @ 2:45 pm Sounds like you need to give her the Secret DVD. Sounds almost as if she has been attracting hardship. :S Posted by enihsnus on Tue, Mar 27, 2007 @ 3:55 pm I agree 100% that a positive attitude does wonders for your mind, body and soul. Posted by chip on Tue, Mar 27, 2007 @ 4:13 pm youve helped make me a convert to the ways of positive thinking. my thoughts are with you and your family. Posted by aboutaboy on Wed, Mar 28, 2007 @ 9:53 am It might very well have made a difference if she had made some more long range choices to be happy and open to the good in life. I think it’s more of a process than a sudden turn. Even with you, you’ve been making positive choices for a long time, and it’s had a cumulative effect in your life, although recently you’ve entered into a new dimension of understanding and practice. Posted by DEL on Thu, Mar 29, 2007 @ 5:38 pm Leave a comment
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