Penis Envy

Dec 8, 2008 | Filed in Foreskin, Sex | 10 Comments

It’s been a little over 2 months since I started restoring my foreskin, and the journey has turned out to be surprisingly intense both emotionally and physically.

When I first started the process, I didn’t know what to expect. I’d been thinking about restoring my foreskin since 2000. I don’t know what was stopping me, other than fear of the unknown. What if I didn’t like it? What if it was unhygienic? There were many questions I had.

I finally decided to start the process at the end of September. I started a very simple daily routine of pulling the loose skin of my penis outward as far as it would go over the head. Within just a few weeks, I noticed the skin seemed to be a bit longer. It was working, and I was pretty happy about it!

Physical Results

By the end of October, I began to really notice a difference in the skin. I could feel it moving up and down during sexual activity, and the feeling was quite nice. Let’s be honest here — sexual pleasure was my only motivation for doing this. Uncircumcised penises have much more intense sensations during sex.

As November progressed, I had enough skin to completely cover the head by pulling it forward. Since my frenulum had been snipped when I was circumcised, there was nothing to hold it up, so it rolled back down after I let go. When I had an erection, I couldn’t completely cover the head, but I could pull it up far enough to cover most of it. That is a very exciting feeling.

The day before Thanksgiving, I had another happy surprise. I felt something odd in my pants, and thought my underwear had bunched up. But when I looked down, I realized that for the first time, the skin had rolled up over most of my penis on its own. It felt so comfortable, being protected by my own skin. That was a good day.

Emotional Results

I didn’t expect to have any emotional changes during this, but I have. Some psychologists believe that the act of circumcising a baby traumatizes him for life. Just think about it… as a newborn baby, one of our first experiences in this world is being held down on a table, fully awake and aware, and having the skin of our penis mutilated. What world do we live in that this kind of action is acceptable?

Restoring my foreskin has somehow made me feel complete in a way I didn’t even know was missing. I know women would probably roll their eyes at this, as they already think we men are obsessed with our penis. There’s probably some truth to that too, but the penis really is the symbol of a man’s sexual identity. When it has been cut up the way foreskins are, how could we not feel like lesser men?

I feel like I’m the way I was meant to be… the way I was born. It’s even made me feel confident in other aspects of my life, although I can’t explain why. Nobody sees my penis except for Rodney, and occasionally one of our cats sees it when they sneak a peek at me in the shower. But really, my penis is for my eyes only. Yet just knowing that it’s being restored makes me feel better.

The Future

I still have a journey ahead of me, as it will be awhile before I finally have enough skin to actually cover the head all the time. Without a frenulum, you have to grow enough skin for it to roll over the head on its own. The weight and length of the extra skin keeps it covered. But I’ve made great process in a short period of time and I am happy to keep going forward.

I’ve also bought a product that helps protect your penis in the way a real foreskin does. Since it doesn’t stay covered all the time on its own, this product simulates what a foreskin would do by keeping it covered and protecting it from friction. I’ve only been using it a few days, so I’m not ready to provide a review yet. But if I like it, I will tell more about it.

Closing

I never knew I’d have a sort of sexual re-awakening as an adult. This process has been as unique as the one we have as young boys when we first start puberty and realize the pleasures our penis can bring. Now as an adult, I’m able to feel the things the penis was meant to feel. Throughout this process, some of you have spoken up and said you were curious to try this for yourself. The best advice I can give is DO IT! You just have no idea what was taken away from you when that doctor mutilated you. Thankfully you can get some of it back.

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About Nathan

I'm a happily married gay man, self employed as a website designer, writing about my life and the world as I see it.
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