Oh, David
I just love David Archuleta. He’s so adorable and as much as I tried to hate his sugar-filled teenage pop song “Crush”, I must confess it finally won me over. Thankfully he’ll be 18 in a few weeks, so I’ll finally be able to stop feeling bad for thinking he’s cute.
You know what they say… I keep getting older, but the girls boys stay 18. 
But I think he’s destined to be the next Clay Aiken… talented, dorky, and will probably stay in the closet until 5 years later, when nobody cares anymore and he decides to impregnate someone while simultaneously coming out on the cover of People.
Oh, David.
I appreciate the fact that his celebrity status has not kept him from buying clothes at Target. In the photo above, you’ll see David and I both own this green rock n’ roll t-shirt, which is funny because we all know that neither David nor I know the first thing about rocking out to anything. Ask me to name all the hit songs by Madonna, Cher, and Judy Garland, and then maybe we can talk.
Speaking of which, did you know David was inspired to start his singing career because of Les Misérables? His first public performance was the Dolly Parton version of “I Will Always Love You”. Don’t even bother coming out of the closet, David. We can just follow the breadcrumb trail to your circuit party. *WINK*
I shouldn’t have said that. There really is something innocent and pure about David, and I think it still might be a few years before David drinks the West Hollywood water. I think he’ll find himself a nice, wholesome girl (he is a Boy Scout, afterall) and make an honest effort to settle down with her. After a few rocky hours days of marriage, he’ll realize he prefers men, and rebel against his Utah upbringing and his control freak of a father, who has been reported as a nightmare of a stage dad by many witnesses.
And that’s the story of David.
Now in other news… why can’t Jive Records even provide the poor boy with a decent website?
His debut album is in stores now, the first single has been out since August, and his official site says “Coming Soon”.
I can’t believe a full album on a major record label doesn’t even warrant a decent website.
Well, I’ll close with this adorable photo of David, shopping with one of his hags. Work it, super models!
(The countdown begins before legions of angry female fans under the age of 15 find this blog post and come after me.)
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Oh, Nathan. You’ve put my thoughts into words. Thank you.
My goodness, we’re feeling spicy today, aren’t we? All true, but still spicy! Yeah,that Mormon church has got him by the balls…good and tight. And always will. Even if he gets out (a guy can hope, can’t he???), the deep rooted upbringing will be a tough one for himn to rid himself of. I wish him nothing but success and happiness….he looks like an honest and genuinely nice young guy. Now…..how soon is turning 18?????
oh, Nathan!
you definitely look hunkier in the t-shirt, no doubt about that!
So very funny–but I do feel sympathy for Miss Archuleta. It was bad enough having just the jocks in school debating my sexuality. Imagine if you were young David and having an entire country do it!