thick, wet, squishy slugs

Jan 22, 2007 | Filed in Humor | 11 Comments

When it comes to the creepy crawlys, I’m fairly cool about most of them. Small bugs don’t really bother me. Bigger ones sometimes do. When women at work are scared of a bug, they usually come to me to kill it.

This weekend, Petey was outside using the bathroom, and he started lifting his front paw in the air. What was he doing? I brought him inside and he kept trying to bite at something. I reached under him and felt something wet and squishy.

I jumped back. WHAT THE FUCK???

It was a big, fat, juicy slug hanging from his fur. Just dangling there.

Slugs don’t usually bother me, but this one did because I knew I was going to have to reach down there and pull it off Petey’s fur. I grabbed a paper towel and went for it. Petey was moving a lot, and that didn’t help.

The slug fell off and landed on the kitchen floor. There it was, just relaxing on the floor.

I turned into a monkey. I was making all kinds of sounds, jumping around. I did NOT want to pick this slug up. And I had touched it. Blehhhh.

So I reached down with the towel and picked it up. I could feel how thick and squishy the slug was through the paper towel. Yuck. I ran over to the bathroom and flushed it.

This was not my proudest moment.

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I'm a happily married gay man, self employed as a website designer, writing about my life and the world as I see it.
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