Friday Funnies: Liza Minnelli on Larry King
I love that crazy chick. Consider this my early April Fool’s gift to you.
open relationships.
Okay, my friend Kirk brought this topic up and I’ve decided I want to talk about it. I know it’s controversial, and I’m not trying to make any enemies. I discussed a few controversial things last year, and it didn’t go over too well with my readers.
Less restrictions, less problems, right?
The concept of “open relationships” is pretty well-known in the gay community, and it’s actually becoming increasingly popular with straight people too. It allows you the ability to choose a partner, but still have the freedom to sleep with whomever you want.
Millions of couples break up each year because somebody has been unfaithful. By eliminating the concept of cheating, it appears that the relationship is more secure. If you never have to worry about your partner cheating, then you never have to worry about the relationship failing, right?
Nothing worth having comes easily
Well, maybe not. Nothing is that simple. I believe the best things in life are the ones that you have to fight for. Is it easy making that first car payment? No, but you worked for it. Is it easy buying that first house? No, but you worked for it. Is it easy to commit to one person? No, but you worked for it.
I’m not saying relationships are the same as a car or a house. But all good things come with hard work. Let’s say you’ve been single. You’ve dated all kinds of schmucks, looking for “the one”. So now you’ve found that special person. Why would you want to share them with someone else? Why would you want to jeopardize a special bond that only 2 people can understand?
Yes, fidelity is difficult
I’m not a saint. I’ve been with my partner Rodney for 5 years. Yes, my fidelity has been tested many times. But Rodney is my best friend. We have a very special relationship that nobody else sees. When we are alone, we are vulnerable, we are honest, we are tender and loving. I can truly say that none of our friends or family have ever witnessed the connection we have when it’s just the 2 of us. If a 3rd person was involved, all that would be broken.
I do understand the benefits of open relationships. It’s like having your cake and eating it too. It’s like having a whole new dimension of sex available to me at anytime. I can go to a bar and have some guy suck my cock in the corner without any guilt. Kinky, adventurous, exciting. Yes, I know.
But how do I know where my life is going if I don’t even know I’ve got something solid in my home? What if one of us makes a mistake, and contracts an STD? We’d always have to worry about safety. And what happens if one of us develops a relationship with a 3rd person? Do we have to divide our time equally?
Don’t pretend it doesn’t happen. I know all about the rules. “Don’t kiss, don’t talk about personal things, don’t sleep with the same person twice.” But we are humans, not robots. We feel things emotionally. There are no guarantees we won’t get attached to someone else, and then what happens to our relationship?
What works for me might not work for you
I’ve said all this because it’s how I feel about open relationships. Not everybody has a relationship like mine. What works for me might not work for others.
So after saying all that, I want to point out that I do accept the fact that some people do have open relationships. Part of it is just human nature. I have never picked up a guy at a bar, I have never had a one night stand. Actually, I’ve never been sexually involved with someone I wasn’t in a relationship with first.
Sex is not casual for me. And I guess the core issue of open relationships is sex. So if your life relies heavily on sex with multiple people, then open relationships are probably right for you.
But my life, better yet my life with Rodney, is built around every aspect of a relationship. We are selfish and we are not willing to share any part of this relationship with 3rd people. We like feel stable and secure with what we have, and we don’t want anyone to interfere.
This is how open relationships fit into our life. What works for you might be completely different.
scare me – the show
This video clip is supposed to be a combination of Jackass and Punk’d. The concept is simple. A few guys go around scaring people, simply by jumping out at them. It’s the easiest form of playing a pranks. Okay so I know this is kind of immature, but it made me laugh, so I wanted to share it.
On a sidenote, I won’t be posting much this week because I’m busy with some other stuff. While I’m gone, go buy yourself some nice porn from AdamMale’s newly re-designed website 
now I feel old.
Does anybody remember Haley Joel Osment? He was that awesome child actor from “Sixth Sense” and “Pay It Forward”.
I just saw a new photo of him and couldn’t believe how grown up he was. His 18th birthday is coming up in April.
The first thing I thought was “Wow, he’s kinda hot, and just a few weeks away from being legal.”
That’s terrible! I sound like a dirty old man. Lusting over guys who are nearing their 18th birthday. Geez.
I never thought I’d say the boy from “Sixth Sense” is hot.
shitfuckdamnbitchwhatthehelliswrongwithme?
Wincest makes girls wet.
You learn something new everyday. And I’ve learned a lot today!
Last November, I caught on to the WB series “Supernatural”. It’s about 2 brothers who travel around fighting spirits, ghosts, and other paranormal. After seeing a few episodes, I thought these guys were really gay (and really hot!). So I wrote a post called “Supernatural is Supergay”. It was all a big joke, of course. But it has steadily picked up traffic from “Supernatural” fan sites and it’s pissed off plenty of people along the way.
I’ve now discovered a whole new level of “Supernatural” fans. Apparently there is a term called “wincest”. The brothers’ fictional last name is Winchester. So they’ve combined the words “Winchester” and “Incest”.
So these fans get together and write fictional stories about the brothers having a romantic affair. They call it “wincest” and they write all these sexual fantasies about the 2 guys getting it on.
WTF? Really? Further, these are girls writing them. Yeah. Girls are getting off on hot stories about the 2 brothers having mansex.
Here’s an excerpt from kitipurr:
“Sam slung one leg over his, one knee moving between Dean’s so Sam could rub their groins together. The friction was delicious, and Dean groaned as Sam’s lips moved up to find his, tongue pressing for entrance gratefully given. They moved against each other, hands exploring lazily.”
Gosh, I am really out of touch with the dating scene. Is that the new thing? Are women twirling their holes to gay guys?
Well, I dunno what to say. I’m not a big fan of incest, but I’m just fascinated that women get off to this. Who knew?
Related Posts:
- “Supernatural” is Supergay
- I told you “Supernatural” is gay
The Electronic Curse, Part 2: E-mail
Oh, the blessed curse of e-mail. It’s a wonderful way to convey a quick message or share a long story with a pal. But it’s also a wicked bitch, isn’t it?
E-mail makes it so easy to misunderstand someone’s tone. There have been many times I thought someone was a jerk because of the way they composed an e-mail. Likewise, people have been upset with me because of how I wrote an e-mail.
E-mail makes us hypersensitive. If we don’t receive a reply within a few hours, we start to form our own scenarios. Is he ignoring me? Why hasn’t he written? That lazy bastard.
Just 10 years ago, the internet was still uncommon in many households. If we wanted to write someone, we had to write a letter, mail it, and wait for a response. That could take a whole week!
Of course, we could always call them. Then again, we still can call. But we often choose e-mail because it’s easier to convey things when we can see our words.
So my point is…
I’m just saying that technology is both good and bad. I can’t imagine my life without technology. What would we do with our time? How would we meet all these awesome human beings in the world? I don’t have a specific point or moral to this story.
More than anything else, I’m writing this because it’s thought-provoking. I do my best to find balance. I try not to run to the phone. I try not to let e-mail substitute a nice conversation with a friend. And I felt like talking about it.
Related Posts:
- The Electronic Curse, Part 1: Phones
fear this.
Okay, it’s been awhile since I told you anything about myself. How about some of my phobias?
Altophobia
This is the fear of heights. It started when I was about 3 years old. I wanted to climb a mountain, so I decided to start with my dresser. I started climbing it by the drawers, grabbing on to the handles. Naturally, the damn thing fell on me. I wasn’t really injured, but I always felt insecure because the dresser failed me. So whenever I’m high up, I think something is going to fail me again.
Verminophobia
This is the fear of germs. I could write a book about this. To make a long story short, wash your hands before you eat, and use Clorox wipes on shopping carts, keyboards, mice, remote controls (especially in hotels), and never get ice from a restaurant or fast food place. Trust me.
Necrophobia
Fear of death or dead things. I don’t think this one even requires explanation.
Pyrophobia
Fear of fire. Nope, I don’t like it at all. I only do fairly well with candles.
Ophidiophobia
This is a fear of snakes. Can’t stand ‘em! I know they help control the population of things like mice, but still…don’t like them at all.
And now, some funny phobias that I found on The Phobia List:
Venustraphobia- Fear of beautiful women.
Metrophobia- Fear of poetry.
Menophobia- Fear of menstruation.
Medorthophobia- Fear of an erect penis.
Macrophobia- Fear of long waits.
Amathophobia- Fear of dust.
Alliumphobia- Fear of garlic.
Cacophobia- Fear of ugliness.
Coprastasophobia- Fear of constipation.
Eurotophobia- Fear of female genitalia.
Geniophobia- Fear of chins.
So what are you afraid of?
little punk.
Who is this little turd sending photos to me through his cell phone? I got such a laugh out of these, I had to share.
yep, that’s gay ricky
I love the new super improved closet-case Ricky Martin. He’s hotter, blacker, and more sexually confused than ever.
And don’t worry about the scene where he pours creamy milk all over his face and chest. There’s nothing gay about that.
On a sidenote, I thought the scene where the 2 women were humping was very hetero, indeed. That’ll throw them off!
Click here to watch Ricky’s new video, “It’s Alright”.
(Your song title says it all, Ricky. It is alright. Come on out.)
The Electronic Curse, Part 1: Phones
Isn’t technology amazing? If it weren’t for technology, I wouldn’t be sitting here, sharing my thoughts online with all you lovely people.
It’s a blessing and a curse. I constantly struggle to find balance.
Let’s start with phones. The problem with phones is that we are too accessible. Most people carry their cell phone on them at all times. Have you ever seen somebody scamper through the house to find their phone? Sure, we’ve all done it. But isn’t that odd?
We have caller i.d., voicemail, call waiting, and yet we are still terrified of missing a phone call. We’ll break our necks to get up the stairs, knocking over cats, dogs, spouses. But why? It isn’t as if we won’t know who called. And won’t we be able to call them right back?
Think back to anything before the 1990′s. Do you remember when we didn’t have caller i.d.? When the phone rang, it was a total mystery as to who would be on the other end. And remember when somebody was going to call us long distance? Gosh, what fun.
We’d sit by the phone anxiously. If someone else got on, we’d yell at them and tell them to hang up because we were expecting a long distance phone call. And once we were on the phone, we didn’t want to be disturbed. “Hey, go away, I’m talking to someone long distance.“
